Muse Fanfiction
By request of Gwendolyn. Can the world possibly be ready for this?
Continued on Muse Fanfiction, v. 2007.1.
Date: June 21, 2006
Categories: Fiction, poetry, and fanfiction
Saturday, 11 May 2024
Life, the universe, pies, hot-pink bunnies, world domination, and everything
By request of Gwendolyn. Can the world possibly be ready for this?
Continued on Muse Fanfiction, v. 2007.1.
Date: June 21, 2006
Categories: Fiction, poetry, and fanfiction
Oh boy. Fasten your seatbelts!
Uh-Oh. Here we go…..
I believe you mean “is the world ready”.
Yes, I have issues with grammar.
Oh boy. Wow.
And I’m also somewhat excited! Heehee!
Axa (3),
Sometimes I leave out words when I’m moderating on my Treo. In this case the word was “be.” But that’s all be-hind us now.
Ahahaha…yes. My cousin has a Treo, as I just fond out. It was very fancy-like. I was jealous.
I wish I could muster up the energy to write a Muse fanfiction, but I’m rather disenheartened since my computer deleted the longest one I ever wrote… ;-; It wasn’t Muse though.
can we just sort do an exerpt-thingy, or do we have to write it all out?
(writing it all out as in about 50 pages…)
This is going to be either extremely brilliant or extremely scary.
Whoa GAPAs. Y’all are fast as lightning when it comes to stuff like this. Okay. Here I go. Please, nobody hurt me.
Muse Fanfiction Number One
Prologue
Eight women, all of different ages, lie chatting in the sunshine. A small fair-haired child sat playing nearby. There couldn’t have been a more perfect afternoon. The wind was stirring the wonderfully green palm trees, sending the scent of coconut and hibiscus down the white-sanded beach. The sky was a most resplendent shade of blue, mimicked wholeheartedly by the ocean. And best of all, there were no annoying tourists.
“So Calliope, have Aphrodite and Persephone given you any more trouble over that loon, Adonis?” asked Thalia, a young woman who looked to be in her early twenties with shoulder-length bright red hair and laughing blue eyes, of her eldest sister, giggling in the back of her mind over the event.
“No Thalia, I haven’t. They seem to be getting along well, no thanks to Clio over there!” said Calliope, a lady who appeared to be in her mid-thirties with tired hazel eyes and long, curly brown hair, verbalizing the last part viciously towards her teenage sibling, who was basking drowsily in the sun. She sprang to life after that last comment.
“Hey Aphrodite was asking for it! And do you honestly think I’m happy that she got a loser like Pierius to date me? Really, he cringes whenever I try to write a sentence about pre-Rome Gaul!” cried Clio, a girl who was a surly adolescent to the human eye, with golden locks and green eyes. She stuck her tongue out at Calliope, and then went back to her tan. Calliope rolled her eyes.
“Whoo honey, I don’t know what I would do if Achelous didn’t let me go dancin’!” said a pregnant woman (seemingly) in her early thirties with short black hair and sweet brown eyes. She patted her one-piece-covered stomach, which was huge in its third trimester. A faint hypnotic singing could be heard from the womb.
“Would you listen to that? My Sirens, already singing! I think I’ll have to enroll them in ballet classes when they’re old enough. They’ll be dancers, just like their Mommy!” cried the woman called Terpsichore enthusiastically. All of her siblings couldn’t help but smile at this, even if the singing was seriously getting on their nerves. Even Polyhymnia with her forever deep and serious outlook on life (The Muse of Sacred Poetry can’t help but be thoughtful) smiled under her body veil. Polyhymnia was a a lady who looked like she was in her late twenties when she wasn’t wearing that veil. She was an albino, and since she was constantly out of doors, she had to wear it. She didn’t talk much, but was surely the wisest of her sisters.
Euterpe played a little tune on her double flute, which she always had handy. The faint voices sang with it. Euterpe had long, dirty-blond hair, mischievous gray eyes, and must have been about 23. Her sister, Erato, hummed along, her pale blue eyes, staring off into the distance. Euterpe stopped playing.
“Erato, don’t tell me that your daydreaming of that stupid Otus! He is soooooo out of your league!” said Euterpe. Erato brushed her long black hair out of her eyes.
“Should true love be held against its will/ By those whom with envy are ill?/ The sister of the lover shall not hold her back/ No matter what her jealous attack,” said Erato, gazing still at the ocean horizon.
“You do realize that’s the same quatrain you gave us for the eighty-seven guys, right?” asked Melpomene. Melpomene glared at her sister indifferently. Of eighteen summers she appeared to be, with chestnut hair and piercing black eyes. She plucked a few notes of a sad song on her lyre. Melpomene was always rather depressed and sarcastic, but it never affected the perpetually lovelorn Erato. Euterpe and Melpomene both scowled at their Juliet of a sister.
“Girls, girls, we’re on vacation from now until about the Renassaince! Let’s try and enjoy it!” said Polyhymnia, trying to be the mediator. Normally, Polyhymnia’s word was final, but not this time. They all broke out arguing, even Erato in her lovestruck condition. (“We shouldn’t have left the Europeans by themselves! They’ll start a feudal system and repress creativity and who knows what else!” “I don’t care, I’m flippin’ tired of helping those idiots! They don’t even think we exist anymore!”) Suddenly, the little fair-haired girl who had been playing a few yards away from her sisters looked up from her project. She toddled over to Clio (who was debating furiously with Calliope) and tugged her hand. Clio looked at her youngest sister.
“What do you want, Urania?” she asked viciously.
“Cwio, come wook a’ wha’ I made! I’th a map of da Andwomeda Gawa’ckthy!” Urania said in her lisp. (who decided to put an ‘s’ in that word, anyway?) Clio got up, and was amazed at what she saw in the sand. It was, indeed, a map of the Andromeda Galaxy, but was made with such skill that it was hard to believe that it had come from her little sister, who looked only to be four years old. She looked, stupefied.
“Everyone, come look at what Urania made!” yelled Clio. They all came over, and were equally dazed at what they saw.
“Do ya aww wike it?” asked Urania of her older siblings, her gray eyes huge and innocent. Everyone nodded silently.
“It’s…. whoa,” said Erato, once at a loss for the right poetic mix of words.
“Tank ya. Do ya think I wiww be a good Muthe of Athtwonomy when I gwow up?” asked Urania. They all smiled, and bent down to hug their little sister.
************************************************************
Urania woke up. It was three in the morning, and the year was 2006. She had been dreaming about something that had happened more than a thousand years ago. Urania fingered the painting on the wall, showing a teenage her and her sisters during the Renassiance. They had all retired after that, and Urania was left to find a new team of Muses to help the world. Sure, they weren’t terrible, but sometimes- SPLAT.
Yeah. That. Urania wiped the banana cream filling off the back of her head. It had flown through her window. Stupid pie bots that Chad had built for Kokopelli. Ah, well. Urania shot a look out her window, trying to see if there was anything worth noting in the night sky. Nope. Well, she was up now, so she might as well get ready for her day.
TO BE CONTINUED
Brilliant! its a pity koko and urania cant get along…
****1/2 stars
I hope you don’t mind if I add a little constructive critisizim.
You really don’t need to describe exactly what each muse looks like. Instead, hide clues to their appearences in the parts of the story. It is good to leave some things to the reader’s immagination.
So, basically, this is a thread for stories about the Muses? Written by us? Uh oh.
Once, in Kokonino County, the Muses all got along. Kokopelli was not dead, or mortally wounded, or even a bit under the weather. Before anyone could figure out the meaning of this, the Universe exploded.
THE END.
Are you sure that wasn’t “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy” fanfiction?
16 (OEAD)- No. Perhaps a crossover? Or just some very Adamsian Muse stuff? More research is necessary.
Thank you, thank you very much! I appreciate all who gave me feedback on my story! I might post another part in the near future, but then again, I might not. ChinTsu, grazie for the constructive criticism.
If you all don’t post your own fanfictions, I might just shrivel up and die.
Four and a half, Sensei Yoda? I expected something about two stars lower… thanks.
Gwen- I luff it! Its simply great! Keep on going!
Nice Gwen! The interaction between the sisters was very accurate and realistic. Just one thing about Urania- maybe don’t have her talk as much? It seems like she talks as well as an eight year-old, and she is only four. It seems out of character for a four year old to be asking “do you think I will make a good muse of astronomy?”.
… Then again, she is a Muse, so maybe it makes sense that she would be asking such things at such a young age. I don’t know. I just thought I’d suggest that, but now I’m not sure if it makes sense.
Great job though, you’re an excellent writer.
The good dragon defeated the evil prince, and then she and the princess escaped fro mthe castle, (defeating the prince’s evil henchman on the way) and lived happily ever after in a big house by the lake.
Expand on that.
ooh, fanfiction! Fun.. I’ve only read the first few sentences of yours, Gwen (I don’t have my contacts in yet and I’m seriously myopic (so sorry for the myriad of typos which I certainly will make) and I was too excited over the thought of feather/pwt slash (or maybe not. would that be too raunchy for the museblog?) to finish reading before dashing off to post), but it looks good so far, except for the fact that you change tenses after the first sentance.. but yay. and good idea for a thread. and pentatonikk/rrf, I like yours a lot.
on fanfiction, but not on muse, could people suggest any?
Okay, I’ll expand on part of it.
The part where the brave princess defeats the evil henchman.
The brave princess and the good dragon tiptoed through the corridors of the unpleasent prince’s castle. All seemed well.
There didn’t seem to be anybody around. No one at all.
But just as they reached the very large entry hall, they heard a terrible crashing sound!
“What was that?” shouted the good dragon.
The brave princess swiftly drew her sword!
“Come on out and fight you rotten pile of flith!” she shouted.
And then, suddenly from the shadows, the evil henchman pounced! He flexed his bulging muscles, and drew an enormous sword from his belt. The good dragon reared up on her hind legs, ready to roast the bum to bits.
“Get him good dragon!” commanded the brave princess.
The good dragon blew red hot flames at the evil henchman, who swiftly held up his fireproof sheild to block the fire!
“Oh heck! Get out while you can good dragon, and leave this piece of uncooked meat to me!”
The good dragon scurried for the exit!
When she was gone, the brave princess and the evil henchman began to fight!
EH swung his sword at BP, but she jumped out of the way, just in time!
BP grabbed an old cable, and pulled on it. The cable carried her up into the rafters of the unpleasent prince’s castle.
EH followed swiftly!
When they were both up in the rafters, the duel continued! EH tried to behead BP, but BP blocked his sword with a fast parry, and knocked him down onto a lower rafter! She jumped down after him!
“Get up and fight me like a man!” she yelled.
“Ooooh, I’m scared. Is the pretty little princess gonna stick me?” sneered EH.
EH charged like some sort of demented beast, aiming his sword at BP’s heart!
BP jumped to the side, swung her sword around at EH’s neck, and sent his head soaring through the air, right into the good dragon’s mouth!
“Thanks for the bite” she said.
“Don’t mention it.”
HOLD ON A SECOND!
This story is mssing its begging, middle, and end.
I just did the end of the middle, and the beggining of the end.
We need more Musers.
Can anybody expand this?
In a place known as Kokonino Country 8 beings live known as the MUSES. The muses inspire well us…My name is Christina the only reason I know this is because…well if you wanna know I’ll tell y’all.
You Want to know?
Okay, Here it goes….
I was at home reading on something called the muses they were eight ladies who inspired art and history my teachers had made me do. It was lightning outside I should of turned off the computer I said aloud, “Why did my idiotic teachers make me research on a bunch of fictional people whose names I can’t pronounce!”. Lightning then struck outside and my computer screen went blank. “Great!” I yelled “I am soooo going to fail my history class ’cause of ladies who don’t exist and are too smart for their own good!”. My computer turned back on but with a desert scene. I stared at the screen and it pulled me in.
_______________________________________________
What do you think so far?
Continuing the muse fanfiction, part 2
After washing her face, Urania did something she had never done before, something that only her sisters Erato and Polyhymnia did:
she daydreamed. She remembered all of the times they had together, and how great they had been, and how sad she had been when she had heard of their retirement. She sighed and snapped out of it, deciding to (for the second time this morning) do something she never did: she went to the retirement community where her sisters lived. It was a good three hours walk to Kokonino County retirement home, but Urania enjoyed the whole walk, again daydreaming about her sister’s and her past, wondering where she would be now if people still believed in Muses. Suddenly, an idea hit her like lightning. She puzzled over the details, and by the time she was at the R.C. door, it was foolproof. All she had to do was get her sisters to agree.
She found her sisters in the lobby, chatting with a woman who looked like she was in her 30’s. Closer inspection revealed that her legs were nonexistant, she intsead had a purple cloud of smoke where they should have been.
When her sisters saw her, they were…well…not very enthusiastic, but not unhappy either.
Terpsichore was the first to greet her.
“Well, Urania! How..unexpected to see you.”
Urania tore here eyes away from the purple smoke and replied
“Good to see you to, Terpsichore. Who is this?” Urania said, gesturing towards the other woman.
“This is Eris, the goddess of chaos. She’s my siren’s private tutor. I must say, she does a remarkable job,” said Terpsichore.
“Pleased to meet you Eris.”
Urania then inquiredhow the babies were(fine) where they were (an ocean near Syracuse) how many there were(4), and how old they were(317 years old).
Listen, Eris, I kind of need to talk to my sisters alone for a couple of minutes, is that all right?”
“Just fine.”
Eris disappered(literally, in a cloud of purple smoke) and Urania addresses her sisters.
“Listen, have you ever thought about what we’d be doing now if people still believed in muses?”
A collective yes went up from all her sisters.
“Well, what if we could change the past? What if we could make people believe in muses again?
“Impossilbe,” scoffed Clio.
“No, not impossible. Do you remember Chad and AEIOU?”
(Urania had introdus=ced them at the Kokonino county annual picnic last year.)
Everyone eventually noddeed.
“Well,”Urania continued,”what if they could build something to do just that?”
After a second of dead silence, her sisters exploded into a frenzy of comments, compliments, and complaints.
The Muses Meet X-Men…
Not so long ago, perhaps in the near future, perhaps in the near past, and perhaps more either way, there was a manor house somewhere near New York City. It boor a heavy wooden door with a lion’s head doorknocker, and ivy crept up the barely visible brick walls. News that renovations – most of them extrordinarily odd ones, some involving huge, round rooms with some barely pronounceable name – had been performed on it recently was heard about the nearby towns. And there was a basketball court with a suspicious crease down the middle in the back. And of course, there was that plaque. That brass plaque, placed right by the door. The one that read, ‘Professor Charles Xavier’s School For Gifted Youngsters.” Of course, that’s what the general public thought, no matter how oddly diverse the students were. But inside, it would be instantly obvious what the school was really for. Children appeared and disappeared in flashes of smoke. Some had pointed ears, others had claws. Some fell and scraped their knees, and were completely healed ten seconds later. There were young girls who put out fires with a wave of the hand. There were little boys that suspended themselves in midair while talking with friends. There were highschoolers who were completely blue, teenagers who walked on ceilings. So it was natural that the four young Muses fit in.
Continue as ye please.
How many stories do we have going at once now…3? 4? 1249?
I dunno. If you dinna liek it, laddie, though t’d be a mighty heartless thing teh do, ye could discontinue me story. I dinnae think I shall evaer finish it, enyhaew. Wheesht.
No, I haven’t been reading Lad With The Whistle.
I dinna ken that that book existed. Crivens! I ken how to talk like this through Wee Free Men by Terry Pratchett.
Nac Mac Feegle: Aye, Crivens! Good job, Jadestone! Ye’s gone and got us lost! We’re suposed to be at the mostly Harmles thread!
Jadestone: Not my fault! You got distracted by a shiney object!
Nac Mac Feegle: So did you.
Jadestone: True enough. *gives special sheep linement*
Nac Mac Feegle: Drink! Comeon, all! Les get drunk!
Jdestone: Oh dear.
THE HAPPY STORY (REALLY TRULY TOTALLY) Once upon a time there were some adorable fairys dressed in pink ugly tutus.They lived in a strangely unpolluted woods filled with singing chipmunks.One day a GIGANTIC MUTANT RIENDEER came and ate the insipid and idiotic fairys who were planning to take over the world by brain washing 4-year-olds to play with sicko plastic figiurines of them.
THE END *sniff* Sorry…………I always cry at happy endings
Yay!!!! Go mutant reindeer!!!!
Nobodydude was having nightmares again. He hadn’t been able to sleep very well since Frodo replaced him on Museblog. But this time his nightmare was different, because this time it was real. Nobodydude saw a dark room and as his eyes adjusted to the light he could see a chair, he thought that he could see someone in the chair, but his attention was drawn to a person who had come into the room. The person wore fake glasses and braces. As the person bent down on one knee his crown fell off and reaching for it the person said in a low voice “It has been done Master.†As the person stood up, he could see that the teen (for it was a teen) was wearing a tee-shirt that said in bold letters “Muse Conventionâ€. Still slightly bent down, Nobodydude couldn’t see much more. Swiveling around in the chair, the person in the chair said “Good, number two, good. Now enlist others to our cause. Squinting a little Nobodydude could barely make out the outline of two stick legs and two stick arms. In one of these arms held a flute. “Now go.†said the thing in the chair. Standing up completely, Nobodydude could see that the teen had on a sticker; it said “Hi My Name Is Kokopelli #2 a.k.a. Mutt†on it. As Mutt walked away Nobodydude started to wake up. He thought about how real his dream seemedfor a moment, then forgot about it. If only he had told someone the chaos could have been avoided.
okay someone better post something about my story.
it’s phantastique. How many alter egos do you have? Or am I confuzzled? Probabably. Anyway. Your story is amusing.
36-i think im on my 4th, Nobodydude, Frodo, Ptolemy, and A Dijinn
Feather/Pwt slash? There’s a scary thought. Nine Muses=endless possibilities for very sick pairings.
THE SEQUEL
or, Yes, The One With the Ominous Music Playing in the Background– Wait, is This Thing On?
The Muses, although they didn’t theoretically exist any more, were still not arguing. In fact, Kokopelli had just served everyone a delicious banana cream pie, and graciously refrained from stuffing their faces for them.
“I thought I blew you up already,” said God. And the Universe (although it theoretically didn’t exist any more either) exploded again, just to prove a point.
Anything is possible in the world of fanfiction. I’ve seen it all.
-floats off-
38-Is that in fact slash though?
Hmm…mebbe we should just put them together and see how they react. Trick to find Pwt’s gender. Unless he’s gay…oh well, so much for that theory…
Slash is rather sick and wrong. Please don’t do it. Please. I begs. It’s one thing to put 2 characters together who have been mentioned by the author to be gay/lesbian but unless the author tells you that, don’t do it.
I need to read Wee Free Men. The only time i’ve seen the Nac Mac Feegle is in Carpe Jugulum, although they might’ve been in another book i’ve read and i’ve just forgotten…
I definitely haven’t been reading this thread. I’ll read it ALL when i have time, i promise. For now, i don’t have time because i have my LAST DAY OF GYM! w00t! HUZZAH! Free at last! O happy day!
CONTINUED
The Muse Convention had been in the works for years before it was made a reality, but one rotten blogger would ruin the bunch.
As Mutt set up what appered to be black boxes (appered to be that is) someone noticed what she was doing, it was Purple Panda, alias Malignant Mandolin alias Clara. PP asked “Whats with the boxes?” “N-n-othing.” stammered Mutt afraid that she would be cought. “Okay.” said PP as she walked away. In a building near the Convention Kokopelli waited for the signal that he would recieve. Receiving it, he pressed the button that controlled the black boxes and activated the improbbability field. The most improbable thing to happen happened, Mutt became a mutt, PP became a Panda, only Queenie J. and Kiki the Great stayed the same or at least somewhat the same. Queenie was in an exteremely loud conversation with A Dijnn about why he was scared with her when the IMF was activated. Confuzzeled, she looked around but all that she could see was a bottle. She glanced around at the donut table where Copper Yeti, JS and Chairman Grant O. were singing the lumberjack song. She saw a Yeti that was made of Copper, a peice of Jade, a chair with a head on it and a Voilet Fire. Hyperventelateing she picked up the bottle, franticly rubbing it. As A Dijinn started to appear in the smoke she calmed down and told him to get back in the bottle. As he driffed back into the bottle Quennie…
1`
srru gotogo
the world is not ready for this
I agree somewhat.
Continuing from Dragon’s
“Absolutely FANTASTIC!” exploded Euterpe, her eyes crackling.
“NO!” yelled Calliope.
“Of course it will, Calliope!” shouted Clio (she loved to have and excuse to argue with her eldest sister)
“Hey, let’s go ahead and give it a whack!” cried Thalia, trying to stifle giggles about her sister’s foolish optimism.
“It’ll never work, and even if it does, it will all end badly,” commented Melpomene bleakly. So cheery, isn’t she?
“If it helps me meet cute guys/ This plan I can not despise…” said Erato almost to herself
“What’ll happen to my Sirens?” wondered Terpsichore outloud.
“SILENCE!” screamed Polyhymnia, her red eyes livid against her pale skin. The din ceased. She cleared her throat.
“I believe that if Urania wishes to experiment, she may. I know that Chad and Aeiou are very trustworthy characters, who will probably help Urania. But,” broke off Polyhymnia, also breaking off Urania’s ascending hopes.
“Urania must be extremely careful. Any false move, and we could end up as chickens strutting around some farm in West Virginia.” No one laughed at this. They all knew it was true.
“Thank you, Polyhymnia,” said Urania, nodding deeply. She bade farewell to her sisters, and walked out the door.
Despite her hunger, Urania did not choose the path to her observation tower, but rather to Chad’s and Aeiou’s lab. She took out her Intelligent Air terminal (which she always kept handy) and messed with it while walking.
She helped a the astronauts on the International Space Station with their little solar panel dilemma, she advised a group of astronomers on red giant observation, and she assisted a scientist with his analyzing of some deep space asteroid particles. By the time she had arrived at the lab, Urania had had a very productive morning.
Aeiou, Craww, and Chad were all sitting down to a breakfast of synthetic prune juice and donuts when Urania walked in. It was about twelve, so it was a rather late breakfast.
“Good morning Urania! Help yourself to a few donuts! There’s some synthetic prune juice in the refridgerator if you’d like it,” said Chad, jerking his thumb at the refridgerator behind him. Aeiou wordlessly pulled over a cable spool about the size of a chair to the table.
“Thank you Chad,” said Urania, taking a maple-glazed donut. She tried to avoid the prune juice, which didn’t sit very well in her stomach. They all munched in silence for a few minutes, until Aeiou started to wave her sleeves.
“What brings you here today, Urania? Normally you stay shut up in your tower all day!” translated Craww. Urania hesitated for a moment.
“I need your help.”
Did anyone like my story?
40 (Ebeth)- Some of it would be. Chad/Koko, for example is slash. Mimi/Crraw is not slash, but sick and wrong anyway.
45- what story, u need to say
(insert post # here)-
Did anyone like my story.
wait … um it was a little short
Once Urania had swallowed the last of her donut, she filled Chad and AEIOU in on her morning. She told her story very fast, but even so, by the time she got to the part about Eris and Terpsichore’s sirens, Crraw’s eyes had glazed over. When she finally finished her explanation, she looked at Chad and AEIOU for a reation. They sat very still for a moment, then Chad finally spoke.
“I think that we could give it a whack. We’d need to talk to your sisters of course to work out the details, but we could do that another time. I daresay they’ve had enough of us for one day.”
Crraw finally snapped out of his trance and translated “AEIOU thinks it’s possible, if not probable, with details, and thinks that we should go see your sister’s right away.”
“Weeeeelllllll…,”Urania began, “They were pretty split about the whole thing. It was either love it or hate it, but I’ll bet Mimi could change their minds.”
“Then that’s that. We go get Mimi, then on to the retirement home. Just let me grab a few things…” Chad rushed through the door to the laboratory, while AEIOU conntacted Mimi on her intelligent air terminal (Chad had installed a new feature, namely using the IATs as a form of cell phone, just last week).
Mimi rang the doorbell some 20 minutes later, just as Chad emerged from the laboratory, carrying an enormous backpack with everything but the kitchen sink stuffed into it.
“Let’s get going,” Chad said. “I want to be at the retirement home before the sun get’s too hot.”
Continuing off Silver Dragon 48-
As they reached the home Urania felt odly tired. It was probably becuase she had made the round trip once before.
They walked inside and re-met Urania’s sisters. Chad set out the equipment. Craww said “AEIOU says: What are you doing? Couldn’t we have set up in the lab?” AEIOU looked at chad with confusion on her face. “Well” Chad began “Urania’s sisters are here. I was figureing we could set up here so that they could help us!” “Ookay…” Urania said. After hours of working, they finally finished. “Done already?” Calliope asked as she came over to the steaming and noisy machine. “Yup!” Chad exclaimed. “After you,” Chad said motioned toward the small door in the machine. AEIOU and Urania stepped in…
TO BE CONTINUED…
…Just as Eris appered beside them.
“What are you doing here?” asked Urania.
Before Eris coul;d answer, the machine was envoloped in smoke. Chad began asking questions, such as what do you want changed, when do you want to go, etc… He plugged thwe information into the computer, and there was an earth-shattering roar.
Pwt could be gay?
Now that’s an intersting thought.
You don’t see a lot of kid’s mags with a gay character.
Good job Lary.
If it’s true that is.
51- *Slaps Cedar* How could you assume that?!! *Outraged face*
No, I’m not againts gay people, but its a kids mag for goodnessake!
*Pies Cedar*
Kokopelli has a crush on Urania. It’s true.
We have documents.
A hopi god and greek muse: How would THAT work out? Imagine what the children would look like…..
(continued from 41. A Dijinn’s post)
“Well, this is rather odd.” said the brown, leathery ice mummy, without seeming to open its mouth. The large Cedar tree waved its branches in agreement, and the Copper Yeti clanged its metallic claws together. “Mischevious” exclaimed Queenie J, who had suddenly acquired a Queen Elizabeth dress and crown.
“And we always know who is behind mischief”
“Kokopelli.” they replied in complete unison. Unrehearsed.
51: And he could have a crush on craww!
This thread hasn’t been visited in a long while. I might post something.
It was a perfectly ordinary day in Kokonino County, which, as you know, is a place where perfectly ordinary days are pretty rare. The Muses had just finished their comments in the margins of the November/December issue, so the Muse Cartoonist wouldn’t be bothering them for another month at least.
Aeiou and Chad were working in Chad’s lab on a Micro-Miniaturizer, so that they could fit Aeiou’s intelligent Giganet computer, weighing 8 tons, into the head of Chad’s Mecha-man Superhumanoid robot. Chad was doing the work, while Aeiou gave technical support from the balcony. Progress was slow, as Aeiou’s translator, Crraw, was shouting out instructions for computer work in between frantic dodges of Pwt’s net. Urania was in her tower, looking at sunspots, oblivious to the drama playing out in the shrubbery, where Mimi was trying to convince Koko to get away from the controls of his banana cream catapult, and that Urania didn’t deserve a pie in the face, particularly not one launched from a trebuchet. Feather was working on his healthy-but-delicious crossbreed of sugarcane and spinach, while Bo tested his latest hybrids. Emma was on lunch break from the Oasis Mirage, eating a delicious sandwich and enjoying the prospect of a bonus next month. The Mini-muses were hiding out in their jungle, providing inspiration to bugs and spiders. All was right with their little corner of the world. And that, of course, means trouble. But this time, it wasn’t Koko who brought it on.
Dang. Best Muse fanfic I’ve ever started, and I go into complete brainlock.
*******************************
The technician opened the door of his boss’s office. He stared nervously at the figure hunched in the ergonomic chair, staring at an instrument screen. Then he spoke. “Madam? Project Omega is ready.”
“Good. Launch the battleship.”
“What, now? But…”
“You said it was ready. You have no possible objection.”
“But-”
“Shut up. Prepare Phase Two.”
*******************************
Thanks, GAPAs. It’s really late, so I’ll work on my Muse Fanfic tomorrow, and possibly get started on the Muse/Eragon crossover. (I’m thinking Kokopelli joins Galbatorix. That would get rid of any cliches pretty darn quick.)
Here we go. Beginning in the middle of the prologue.
“Boetq istari!” he uttered, and…
A strange shadow appeared on the rock next to him, as though a primitive lithograph had suddenly been called to life. Strangely, it was carrying a pie. “Wow,” it said, looking around at the blazing fire. “Can you teach me how to do that?”
The Shade reeled back. “What manner of spirit are you?”
“A Muse. Istari!” The pie burst into flames. “Now I just have to find Feather.”
To be continued…
The Shade snarled and shouted to the surrounding Orcs Urgals. Leaping through bracken and scrub, he bounded towards the cornered elves.
And found them lying, unmoving, on the ground. The horses had bolted, and the elves’ faces were covered in a sweet-smelling, custard-like substance. Bewildered, the Shade spun around and saw a wavering shadow, silhouetted against the fire, dash away to the east. A glint of sapphire showed in its sticklike arms.
The Shade howled. “After him!!”
To be continued…
The shadow raced silently on, clutching the shimmering indigo egg. Urgals stomped after it, making considerably more noise. A sheer rock face suddenly loomed up in front of the shadow, which leaped to the side. The lead Urgal slammed into the rock face and fell backward, creating a domino effect that knocked all of them to the ground.
The shadow cocked its angular head. “Aren’t orcs supposed to be smart? Oh, wait, you’re Urgals. Sorry.”
Then it dashed off into the night.
Back in the conflagration, a brilliant green star appeared, shining purely among the darkly glowing flames. The star widened into a flat, vertical disc of light with wavering edges. Then an image appeared in the center of the disc. It was a desert, with massive red-brown rocks sculpted into surreal shapes by the wind. A velvety purple sky, studded with tiny stars, presided over the scene.
A man stepped out of the disc. He was dark-skinned, wearing a robe that had once been pure white, but was now badly stained with engine oil and vanilla ice cream. He stared around him with an air of resignation. Then he spoke. “He’s gone.”
A woman with pale blond hair, wearing an elaborate toga, was the next to step out. “You shouldn’t have given Kokopelli the code to your internarrative transporter.”
“I didn’t give it to him, Urania! He forced it out of me at pie-point!”
“What flavor?”
“Apple a la mode.”
“That would explain the stains.”
A tall, slender Oriental woman in magenta clothing gracefully leaped out of the disc. A crow hovered above her right shoulder. She waved her long sleeves around in complicated patterns.
The crow spoke. “Aeiou says that maybe you can track down Kokopelli by hacking into his Intelligent Air transmitter- AWWKK!!!!”
This last ejaculation was brought on by a large-nosed, androgynous person in Egyptian clothing who jumped out of the disc and flailed a large net menacingly at the bird. “Let me at him!” the person howled.
“Calm down, Pwt,” came a voice from inside the disc. It was soothing, with just the slightest hint of an Australian accent. “We’re all in this together.”
A skinny woman with spiked hair reached out of the portal and placed a hand on Pwt’s arm. She was wearing a dress with geometric patterns.
Pwt reluctantly put down the net. “Maybe you’re right, Mimi. Where are Bo and Feather?”
A short, plump creature with an orange beak and large, floppy wings waddled out. He looked at the burning trees and burst into tears, flinging his arms around a blackened stump. “Waaaaaaahhhh!!!!!!!!!!”
“Well, Feather’s here,” said Mimi.
A cow stumped out of the disc, which collapsed into a bright green star after it. “I’m here toooooo. Mooooo.”
“Well, all the Muses are here,” said Urania. “What’s our plan of action?”
“Stop Kokopelli from wreaking havoc in this story,” said Pwt.
Urania sighed. “I was hoping for something a little more specific.”
The man in the white robe spoke. “Aeiou’s right. I can hack into Kokopelli’s transmitter and find out where- ”
“MORE of you?” came a thunderous voice from behind him. The Shade strode out from the trees, raising his sword.
“Chad, he said ‘more of you,'” Urania said to the man in the robe. “Does that mean… ”
“Yes,” Chad said. “Kokopelli’s been here. Look, Mr. Durza, sir, if we just- ”
“DIE!” howled the Shade, and raised his hand. A cloud of purple smoke billowed up from the ground, and in it materialized a giant centipede with a bronze exoskeleton and six iridescent wings.
With a horrendous screech that sounded like a wildcat dragging its claws down a blackboard, the centipede scuttled forward. Pwt let out several breathy hisses, and it stopped in its tracks. Pwt screeched once more, and the centipede rubbed its head against the Muse’s leg like a contented cat.
Durza opened his mouth, preparing to utter another incantation, but Chad pulled out an object like a lumpy, metal tangerine and pressed a button on it. A thick wad of air coalesced in the Shade’s mouth. He struggled, making sounds like “Mmmph” and “Bwwlllffrgrl,” but bands of air slammed shut around him, and he dropped to the ground, quivering.
“Right,” Chad said, taking control of the situation. “Pwt, can you get your- um- demon-centipede friend to fly us into the air?”
“I think I can. Why?”
“So that we can chase down Kokopelli more easily. Let’s all get on- um-”
“Mergatroid,” Pwt said.
“Mergatroid?”
“Mergatroid.”
Chad shook his head in disbelief. The Muses filed onto Mergatroid’s back, but it was found that Bo would not fit.
“All right,” Chad said. “Bo, you can just stay here.”
“What?” said the indignant cow.
“Or you can go back to Kokonino.”
“I’ll stay. Hmmmmoooooooph.”
Mergatroid and his riders buzzed away into the night.
Bo turned around and began moodily chewing her cud. She stopped, however, when she saw Durza immobile on the ground.
“Oh. Hello.” She paused. “Dooooo youuuuu know what I just learned? In 1937, a fossilized fragment of trilobite shell was found in Romania. Now, this fragment was significant because…”
Five hours later, Bo had ended her lecture on the different subtypes of trilobite and was just getting into her stride while explaining the chemical composition of the graham cracker and how it related to the rise and fall of the value of wheat flour. As painfully random factoids coursed through the Shade’s tortured brain cells, it became too much to bear. With horrible, muffled screams, he hopped to the edge of a cliff, every small jump agonizing, and leaped off. His fall was halted by a sharp, fire-hardened pine trunk about twenty meters down.
Bo watched him fall. “Hmmooooooph. No thirst for knowledge, eh?”
Chapter Two of Muse/Eragon fanfiction
Warning: May contain spoilers. Dedicated Eragon fans are advised to read with caution, as favorite characters may be placed in situations embarrassing for character and reader (possibly involving baked goods.) This story has not been authorized by Larry Gonick or Christopher Paolini, and the author really really REALLY doesn’t want to get sued, so please don’t tell them.
Deep in Ellesmera, Kokopelli stopped running when he heard a strange beeping noise emanating from his wronket*. He reached into it and pulled out a small, spherical instrument with many dials and buttons. A screen was flashing on it, ghostly green characters flickering hazily beneath its surface.
“So that’s your game, Chad,” Kokopelli mumbled. “Track this.”
He flicked a small protuberance on the controller. It folded up, revealing a green button beneath it. Kokopelli pressed it with relish.
Two metallic wings slotted out of the instrument’s sides. They began to beat, slowly at first, but speeding up until they were just a blur. The sphere lifted off into the night. Kokopelli stashed the dragon egg in his wronket and continued running.
*An invisible pocket of Intelligent Air that Muses keep items in. If you can explain how Kokopelli can produce pies from thin air any other way, I will be very impressed.
Ahh. They’ve got wronkets. That explains it! But are you sure all Muses have them? Or just Koko?
How else does Chad produce spare parts from apparently nowhere? And where does Urania keep her telescope? That robe of hers doesn’t seem to have any pockets. Don’t bother asking Larry Gonick. He’ll just deny everything.
***
The wind whipped Chad’s cap off, but he didn’t notice, he was so absorbed in the tiny transmitter in his lap. “He’s cut southeast to the Hadarac Desert!” the Muse yelled.
“Aeiou says there’s something fishy about all this,” the crow shouted back. “He’s moving too fast. We know he can’t run like that, and there’s no transport in this entire novel that can get up to that speed.”
“Crraw, I’m certain of it,” Chad replied. “We have to follow him. If the egg hatches, this plot will be irretrievably changed.”
With a sound like ten thousand maddened flies, Mergatroid put on an extra turn of speed and shot off to the south, following Kokopelli’s decoy.
***
Kokopelli sat down, exhausted. In the heart of Du Weldenvarden, especially to a being like a Muse, the magic was almost palpable. The air sang with anticipation, as though a great event was about to take place. Which, of course, it was.
There was a crack, soft enough, but it seemed to drown out all the other sounds of the forest.
The egg was beginning to hatch.
(Note: At “Then it dashed off into the night,” the prologue ends, and Chap. 1 begins.)
***
Some hours later, as the gray light of dawn washed across the sky, a cow plodded down out of a steep mountain pass in the Spine. It stood there for a second, surveying the valley below. Then it began trudging down the slope, heading for the tiny village of Carvahall, and in particular, the home of the storyteller Brom.
***
And far away, in the city of Teirm, in a small room filled with sweet, musky scents, a woman bent over the knucklebones cast in front of her. A small boy with a sprig of holly tucked behind his ear surveyed them with equal concentration.
The woman spoke. “Whatever I try, it’s the same. All my attempts to scry have been blocked by the presence of nine entities, strange to this world.”
The boy spoke without opening his mouth. In fact, his words bypassed the troublesome formalities of being spoken and being heard, and passed straight from mind to mind. Do you think that Durza…
“No. Even he doesn’t have the power to summon spirits of this potency. I can only say one thing for sure, Solembum. Alagaesia will never be the same again.”
Chapter Three
The sharp night air whipped past Chad’s face, making his eyes water. Three hundred feet above the Hadarac, Mergatroid was making good time. Chad peered down at his Intelligent Air transmitter, dexterous fingers flicking expertly across buttons and levers.
“We should be right over Kokopelli now,” Chad yelled, “but I don’t see any sign of him.”
“I’ll bring Mergatroid down,” Pwt replied. The Egyptian muse let out a long screech, and their unusual steed descended.
As they approached, Chad could make out a fluttering shadow above the desert sand. Was it a bird? No, too rounded. In fact, it looked just like…
“We’ve been tricked!” Chad howled in frustration. “That’s Kokopelli’s transmitter!”
***
Brom sipped his tea pensively. He had a lot on his mind. Had Arya managed to safely deliver the egg? Did Galbatorix suspect his purposes? And, above all, what did the strange, magical disturbances that had taken place recently mean? He wasn’t sure if they were even magical. Powerful, certainly, but they were so bizarre that it was impossible to tell. In fact, if he didn’t know better, he would swear that they came from outside the world…
Brom’s ruminations were interrupted by a loud knocking on the door. He got up, opened it, and found himself staring into the face of a cow.
Brom looked around. Carvahall was almost deserted, its citizens snoring lustily in their houses.
“Whose cow is this?” he called out, shivering a bit in the chill morning air.
“I’m mine,” the cow said. “And there’s something I think you should know. Have you ever been associated with an organization known as the Varden?”
In fairness to Brom, he recovered well. “Who are you? Did Durza send you?” He sent a tentative probe of thought into the cow-thing’s mind. Then he reeled back, overwhelmed by the explosion of utterly useless knowledge that cascaded into his brain.
“No. I’m a Muuuuuse. There are eight others of us- Chad, Mimi, Crraw, Pwt, Aeioooooou, Kokopelli, Urania and Feather. It’s Kokopelli in particular that I want to speak about.”
Oh, funny! *gasps* Makes Eragon much more interesting to have the Muses running rampant in it.
So Bo explained, as the sun came up and shone through the gaps between the peaks of the Spine. How the Muses came from another world, where Alagaesia was but the setting for a well-known book. How the Muses gave Humans their inspiration for the arts and sciences. And how a certain Muse, specializing in Tunes and Tricks, had stolen the dragon egg intended for the Varden.
“This is horrible.” Brom stirred his tea. “I know you’re speaking the truth, since I sampled your mind. But hold on!” A glimmer of hope lit his grizzled features. “If Kokopelli is one of these helpful beings, he’ll be willing to aid us.”
“Um… ” Bo paused, unsure how to put this. “The only thing Kokopelli is willing to doooo is wreak havoc.”
“This IS bad. A creature like a Muse has enough raw power coursing through its corporeal form to confuse an egg into hatching.”
“Kokopelli as a Dragon Rider… He’ll be insufferable. What’s worrying me is that there’s only one person who can teach him to use his new powers while still causing complete chaos.”
“Galbatorix??”
“Spot on. I need to contact Chad. Hopefully he’s caught up with Koko by now.”
Bo reached into her wronket and pulled out a specially modified Intelligent Air transmitter which had been equipped with small booster jets to accommodate a user without hands. Bo’s sensitive nose flickered from button to lever to toggle switch. Brom watched in awe as a three-dimensional picture formed in the room. It showed a dark-skinned man wearing stained robes that flapped in the wild wind.
“Did you catch up with Kokopelli?” Bo inquired.
“No,” Chad said grimly. “He’s tricked us. He could be anywhere in Alagaesia by now.”
Stunned, Bo cut off the transmission. Brom reached for a small saucer and a bottle of black liquid. “I’ll scry for the egg. If it hasn’t hatched, there’s still hope.”
*reads past 30 posts*
Is this PC’s private RRR?
78- Not sure. No one else has written Muse Fanfiction in ages, so it almost could be. I find it highly amusing.
78- It isn’t an RRR. I simply write as ideas come to me. Robert’s Muse/Harry Potter Fanfic was my inspiration. Do you want to start a Muse Fanfiction? Or Alice? I get lonely on this thread. Rosanne was the most recent poster apart from me, and she posted almost a month ago.
Hmm, maybe I could do that. Let’s see… I’ll definitely think about that, but due to lack of inspiration at the moment, that must be suspended until I have an idea.
I think your hard work deserves a new thread.