That’s the code name for Musers’ secret plan for world domination. It’s so super-ultra-hyper-secret that it doesn’t have to be secret. As you can see from version 2006.1, it is also, like everything else on the blog, more than a bit muddled.
Patience, Please
This site is under reconstruction and will look strange for a while. We regret the inconvenience.
yahoo!!! w00t!!!
Joy! A new Mostly Harmless! 2nd post(I think)!
Pinky:What are we going to do today, Brain?
Brain:Same thing we do every day, Pinky. Try to take over the world!
I made up the original plan for this, I think! It involved Prince Charming and the Oscar Meyer Weiner song.
How about we set loose all the bunnies as a first wave?
I wish the world would revolve back to barbarian times. Then I could be a tr00 metal warrior wearing leather and riding around on horses chopping peoples heads off with giant swords.
No, we should save some reserve bunnies in the unikely event that they’re all killed off in the first wave. Also, then we could send them out to finish eveyone off.
BREAKING NEWS: the earth’s core is made of banana cream pie! if contact is established between hot pink bunnies from Pluto and the core, it will take over Museica! So Museica must take over them first!
the core is the secret
Yes, the bunnies are too precious to send in the front. I vote we put out Kokopelli to do some undercover stuffins for a start. Then once he’s tricked everybody out of their minds, we’ll rush in. XD Oh, and can’t forget the fuzzy piggies! And the galactic pie bombers! And the free back issues! *hinthint*
I can involve Samablamablous in this… I can hynotize her over the phone.
And then KA-BOOM!!!!!!!!!!!!
Or does the KA-BOOM happen before the bunnies?
confuzzled…
PHOENIX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! you’ve returned!
*pies phoenix*
or maybe you retuned before and i wasn’t paying attention, but whatever.
*pies phoenix*
adn the KA-BOOM should come when we attack the base of the evil teenage pop-culture magazines.
The quorld, remember? To take over the quorld!! And we use Pwt Pwns at the end of emails and such to start brainwashing people.
If we really want to take over the world we have some synchronization to do. Who here is willing to run for public office when he or she grows up?
i might…
but if we create an army I can be a general…
or master planner/strategist…
I put pwt pwns in my nano siggie *squeez*
Weren’t we going to attack Highlights too?
Fun times.
*pies all other mags*
14-I think Otzi mentioned running for Prezzie, no?
I could be US treasurer…
Sellouts! Government positions! C’mon, kiki, treasurer? Thats just sad. When do we have to sink so low as to have to be elected to take over the world? 12- I totally agree we should blow up the teen pop culture magazines! My grandfather got me a subscription to 17, not realizing I’m not really into that kind of thing like most “normal” 14’s, so everymonth I get a glossy, ad filled mag with articles like “693 ways to do your hair” Geez, don’t they have anything better to do than think of 693 different ways to tie up your hair? With that kind of time, we could clean up the environment or research cures for degenerative diseases! So quick, blow up their headquarters before all young girls become bimbos and the future is destroyed!
world domination sounds fun.
14-ill do it!
Pwt Pwns.
That is the key to domination. We must rule!! We shalt save the world from Highlights! *shudders*
18- 693 ways to do your hair? I only have two.
Up and Down.
Maybe we should set loose most of the bunnies at first, but save some, just in case. Because we LOVE the bunnies. *smiles crazily*
bunnisebunniesbunniesbunniesbunniesbunniesbunniesbunnies Pwt Pwns
18~ I think our future has already been destroyed…
I’m driving a truck full of military-grade C-4 to the pop culture magazine “17”.
*whistles tune while driving down interstate*
By the way, what city is “17” located in?
14~I’ll be el presidente del mundo (the president of the world)!!!!!!!!!
I’ll send up some satellites to keep our international communications route open…
I’m readying some rockets to send to the magazine “National Enquirer” to blow them and their bogus stories to the moon!!
We need a group name and emblem…any suggestions??
Forget about me being el presidente del mundo…I have to work in secret…
*loads some dynamite into truck*
How about we name ourselves the Word Of Muse Blog’s Atrocious Terrorists (WOMBAT)???
Any ideas for the emblem?
Ideas????
Guys, I have an emblem design here. I will post.
There.
Where is it?
Darn it! If it doesn’t show up, I would like to send it to the GAPA’s email address, and then he can post it. I worked hard on it.
Drat. I just typed out a whole plan and accidentaly deleted it. Wait a moment…
*easy listening muzak*
Okay. The first wave shall be thus:
We train several dozen elite ninja bunny spies. The bunnies infiltrate the HQ of mags like People and Seventeen and replace the subscriptions to these magazines so that subscribers get Muse, instead. This will rewire their brain into being useful, intelligent citizens.
However, if anyone resists the transformation, we will launch heat-seeking pies at them. The pies will be special glue-and-cherry pies made by our Muser cooks, trained by Kokopelli. They will stick onto the popular culture geeks (like Britteney Spears, Brad Pitt, Orlando Bloom, etc.) and pin them into place while we subdue them and bring them to Muse Prison for Idiots and Morons. The Muser jailors will feed them only Regrettable Food and force them to play Geocache until they are ready to be our allies.
However, some things are too evil to reform. Tabloid newspapers, as per the suggestion of Kokopelli#13, will be totally destroyed by us launching pumpkins at them with long range trebuchets.
What should we do with people like whalers and terrorists? I don’t know. Someone needs to think up a second wave. After all plans are complete, we shall appoint Bloggers as generals to carry out each wave, and then set up She Who Must Not Be Named as Grand Poobah of the World, with the GAPA and Mr. Baker as her governers. Yaaay!
Whoever “She Who Must Not Be Named” obviously already has a name. Since people call her that, that’s her name.
I’ll pound a shock wave into the whalers and terrorists. That’ll be the second wave. Blow out all their guns, disable their nukes, and knock out their harpoons.
Remember that truckload of C-4? I never found “17”s headquarters, so I brought the C-4 back. 17 must be in an underground bunker.
Since I’m back, and with the idea of hurling pumpkins at tabloid papers to demolish them, I have decided that ordinary pumpkins will not be enough. We will use the pumpkins much like cannonballs: Cut off the top, throw a charged C-4 in, close it up, fire, and when the pumpkin hits a tabloid or superstore that carries them-like Wal-Mart-I will press the switch that blows the C-4. Those should be a little bit more destructive, and it will have a devastating effect against concrete-and-cinder-block-reinforced buildings.
Let me know when the first wave is initiated so I can start making pumpkin bombs (that sounded like the Green Goblin)…
So what happened to the picture I put on the MuseBlog??? It never got put on? I typed in the correct html text for it…GAPA…help please…
WordPress strips out that HTML whenever anyone tries to post it.
She Who Must Not Be Named=Diana Lutz.
Phoenix- Yes!! I luv your idea!! Carry it out, and I can get SS to give me DL’s adress. Who knows what we could do with that?
But I don’t WANT to be a politician.
can we do this :hack into everyone`s computer so that when the trun on the computer it`s on muse blog and can`t go to another site. then they will read it after a few (frustated) days ! sounds good?
39) How about on the Musefanpage front page? And JUST the front page, make it so they can’t get on any further, and add some screenshots at the bottom of how amazingly Muse-lightful this site is, torturing them with the Museishness, then finally let them go on the other parts, but they must become part of our army to TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!! BUAHAHAHAHAAAAAAA!!!!!
People who are downright evil must be shipped to the moon. We will give them enough food to survive and the equipment to build a city, along with supplies of air, and make monthly checkups to make sure they aren’t escaping.
Mr. Coontz, you don’t have to be a politician if you don’t want to. You can be the Poobah’s advisor or summat.
Laws of the Muse World:
No hurting any person except in self-defence.
No kiling any animal unless you do so humanely and in order to supply yourself with food or clothing that you could not get in any other way.
All people are EQUAL. No racism or sexism.
Over the span of your life, you shall give 1/10 of your earnings to the poor. (So if you had $2000 when you registered, you only have to give $200 even if you get rich and end up with much more money). If you LOSE money and can’t afford it, you are exempt.
And so on.
31-gahhhhhhhhhh! nooooooooo! you made me think of orlando bloom! curse you! people(girls) in my class watch lotr to see orlando bloom. and hes not even a good actor! gah!!!!!!
ok…. rant(however short it was) over
37-who’s DL?
36-make it stop! its very mean, and i dont like it.
didnt you used to be able to post pics?
like the hpb pic, of a reall bunny, but hot pink?
what was that?
hmm… we had the plan to put Lady Bunniful’s HPBs in the Louvre, in order to hypnotize all the beret-a-gogo types and tourists… (Mabye PB&J could help… he’s nearer than most of us. Or maybe FrigidSymphony)
The extra MUSE magazines distributed in doctors’ offices….
The seating of a Muser president (wait for a bit, and I’ll be right with you there… By then I’ll be able to post with my actual name, which is _____________. )
…………….
What have I forgotten?
You forgot the KA-BOOM. You need a KA-BOOM…
42–sorry for making you think of a certain actor who shall from hereonin be reffered to as “Bloop”. Got it everyone? The actor who played Legolas in LOTR and Will Turner in PotC is now named Bloop.
And speaking of 42…
We forgot to make HGttG references in our invasion! Ah, the horror!
pwt pwns
we’re way ahead of you guys. Metalheads are ready and raving to march the streets and decapitate anyone who stands in our way with chainsaws and battleaxes. So there. You’re TO LATE!!! MUAHAHAHAHAAA!
I was thinking along the lines of a commando-style raid on the Louvre in the dead of night, filling the entire building with Hot Pink Bunnies, arranged in artistic poses. The whole of the French press would make adulatory comments about the new exhibition, demand to know who the artist is, and Muse would gain some very useful publicity.
Ooooh, Mr. Baker, good idea!
Did you hear that, everyone? Louvre bunnies!
FrigidSymphony: please don’t decapitate me. We’re all Musers here.
Decapitation is rather harsh. Love the Louvre Idea. Are they going to be real bunnies dyed hot pink or inanimate ones? Because I think the live ones might make a mess of the place and that certainly wouldn’t be good publicity…
50- fake ones of course. we would not want to harm a true hot pink bunny.
and dudes, violence is over rated. no dead people can read muse, so, it is my suggestion that we put people in prison and force them to listen to the oscar meyer wiener/bologna songs until the submit
To take over the world, we need absolute power in at least one country.
51- were there truly a real hot pink bunny, OF COURSE we would not want to harm it. too precious!!! and i agree, that dead people just MIGHT not be able to read Muse. so maybe we should poke ’em until they subscribe. but even then, we must attach little hidden camera’s and mics so we can say, when ever they say “this is stupid” or “i’m throwing this away”, we can say, “I CAN HEAR YOU AND I’M COMING TO GET YOU!” or something equally frightening.
we must especially do this to those two girls who wrote the terrible hate letter to beautiful muse. it hurt me so bad, i don’t even remember their names!
i like all the KABOOMing.
xD!
13-I concur. The quorld!
18-I don’t want to blow up their headquarters. I’d rather drive a tractor through and then loot and pilfer my weasly black guts out.
38-I am tempted to tell you to “suck it up and deal.” But, empathetically, ruler to ruler-I tell ya, fr00d, you’re missing out on such great stuff, man! Don’t you want all those people fawning over you and all that p0w3r?
48-Brilliant. Give that man a Gauloise. And some Banania. No, keep Banania for the victory party in the Bastille. I’ll start fashioning them out of papier-mache along with the Shenandoah, and the rest of you can paint, sculpt, carve, spray-paint, draw, print, splatter, whatever. Ms. Lasley? Who’s the woman who made all those skiddy dense versions of hot pink bunnies, anyway? Those, for a start. And we shouldn’t hurt any of the paintings-that would generate bad publicity.
What about we hack into every bad major newspaper in America and replace their articles with back stories of Muse? And *false facts*? They’re just schills for the government, anyway. We should also commandeer every yacht and use them to form a big bunny-shape in the Pacific ocean, then filter the light to it appears hot pink to visiting spaceships. How cool would that be? And cause all the molecules in everyone’s undergarments to simultaneously jump three feet to the left…especially the Victoria’s Secret models…
Who said we were nice? We’re MUSERS!
hehe. its a total shell game now. anybody got some sea shells? i’m fresh out. used ’em in yesterdays shell game.
54- PERFECT! a bunny shaped yacht circle with pink lights and undergarment jumping molecules! perfect! ‘cept don’t do it in Illinois, it’s supposed to SNOW of alll things tomorrow. JEEZ. Stupid global warming. Or should i say freezing? its like 38 here.
just testing the HTML thingies
RAAR! the thingies didn’t work.
>:(
We need resources. At least a billion dollars.
Suppose we get some of Bill Gates’ DNA, then clone him and indoctrinate the clone with pro-Muse material from the time he is a baby. We will have to develop something that speeds up the aging process so that B2 (the clone) will not remain continually younger than the original. As soon as B2 has gotten to the age of the original, we will stop whatever it is that speeds up the aging process. Then we will send a commando team of trained Musers to infiltrate Bill Gates’ home and replace him with B2.
Of course, it doesn’t have to be Bill Gates. It could be any fabulously rich person.
Back to the plan. B2 will then secretly finance the construction of an enormous apple pie a la mode in deep space. This process will take at least fifty years. The ice cream is the key to this plan, because it will be in such quantity that, if rocketed on a collision course with Earth, it will lower the temperature of the earth significantly and plunge it into a short Ice Age. We threaten to do this, and of course the leaders of the world give up and give us control. The entire planet will be united under the banner of the Quorld. What we do after that is up to us.
57-Why not commandeer that yacht-transporter thingy while we’re at it? That sounds fun. Good plan, by the way.
And find out what the heck is making that bulge on Iapetus. I really want to know. On the other hand, I think I will use it for my NaNoWriMo, so maybe I don’t.
Dilemma.
57-BRILLIANT! omg! thats better than CHEESE! we should SO make a ee-z-skweez cheez pie! EWWWWWWWWWWWW! also, what we do after that: we set up a satellite dish in space, and make it transmit mind control waves. these will get picked up by the brains of the population of the quorld, and they will all suddenly want to read muse. AND we can take those icky skinny models and put them to use. they will model fashions that will contain subliminal messaging, and everyone will want to buy them, so everyone will be subliminally messaged to subscribe to muse. think about all the damage we could do with our mind control wave satellite!
Amazing.
Wait, if everyone reads muse, than won’t it just become mainstream and therefore degenerate into publicly loved slosh? We need to put some quality control measures in here, after all, we can’t erase people’s personalities. I think the catch phrase “you will be assimilated” has been taken already. (by the borg, star trek.)
muse will remain as it is because if it doesn’t i will personally pie every single one of the editors and bring upon them the wrath of all museica.
having everyone read muse is like having everyone know how to add- its caklled education.
and our catch prharse is
PWT PWNS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
hope the html for that works out.
61.) Whoooooaaaahhhh….. Fanceh…………..
thank you
*bows*
(54) Thanks, Queenie J. My graphics arsenal has been upgraded and extended considerably since April and is, of course, always at the service of Mostly Harmless. The bunny sprayer could stand a bit more tweaking but is functional.
57- Grate Ideeea. Just instead of Bill Gates, do it with Bush or Cheney. We need them reblaced.
I really didn’t expect to get that much adulation for my plan. Perhaps we could make it the official “Mostly Harmless” agenda, since everyone seems to like it so much?
*prepares to be pied for outrageous request*
Or maybe we could make it “Subplan 5720062”.
SUBPLAN 5720062That looks awesome.
Oooh…. I like the HTML Zyviva. It looks cool… *stares*”
Umm… hows about we send those pics of the HBPs from the BUNIES BUNIES BUNIES thread(Rebecca made those, right?) out to everyone we know via email with “PWT PWNS” underneath? To freak them out? Then a muse subscription card.
yeah Zyvia, how do u do all that?
i like the idea of the PWT PWNS emailish thing.
I just remembered that scientists have developed a genetic modification that speeds up the aging process. I like the idea for doing it with Bush, tho. It would at least give us America, especially if the Muse staff run for congress.
we could cryogenically freeze Bush, and then when we wake him up, tell him that he was really a mime in central Texas. That would be FUN
72- yeah, that would be awesome, but then we’d also have to deal with his vice president
73- No, Cheney wouldn’t know the difference. This is a clone, remember, only Muse-educated from childhood, so more intelligent than the original.
SUBPLAN 5720062The codenames:
Bush’s clone- B2
The space-based apple pie- Mammoth
Secret cloning facility 50 feet below Muse HQ- Klokopairli Labs
Entire plan- Mostly Harmless (duh)
Musers who infiltrate White House and replace Bush with clone-Kokommandos
I have an idea. Every time you play some sort of game on the computer, and you have to give a name, put “Pwt Pwns”, then try to get to the high score list. If enough people do that, soon the whole qorld will be extremely confuzzled. It will become this big mystery that people cannot solve unless they read Muse!
76- yeh! i`ll do that!
AWESOME! that is SO genius! and about the cryogenically freezing thing: first we have to figure out how to wake them up from the frozenosity, and when we do that, we will be obligated to wake up all the other cryogenically frozen people. like Ted Williams for example.
PWT PWNS! PWT PWNS! wheeeeee!
Now we need to hire an unscrupulous DNA researcher to handle the cloning. What about Woo Suk Hwang? He faked a lot of discoveries.
57~ I’ll lead the commando team. My friend’s friend is Bill Gate’s goddaughter. She calls him “Uncle Bill”
75~ Let’s just tatoo Pink Bunnies on the original’s face. He will be too humiliated to go out in public.
Ditto Mr. LawyershooterVeeP.
80- Qualifications for Kokommando team
Knowledge of martial arts
AND/OR
Expertise with computers
AND/OR
Great throwing arm
Back at last! Who’s on the Kokommando team can i be on
81-Kokomando Team Detail Add-ons
Cheffing skills: to make the pies
Artistry: to write KOKO FOR PRESIDENT on the crusts
That’s all i can think of at this point
How about we…
-Collect those little metal bottletops and nail them upside-down to the floor. This will give the sensation-of-walking-on: little metal bottletops glued upside-down and nailed to the floor.
-Re-name Cricket ‘Muse for Spawn.’
-Develop a radical alternative to diesel fuel. Custard…
Can I be on the commando team? I’m a foil fencer, I can mouthblade, and I do judo. Plus, I can type at 95 words per minute.
we-el…
I can run reasonably fast, hit people with my Lacrosse stick, and I can throw well. However, I never joined baseball. They wouldn’t let me in.
Queenie, your skills sound good. You are hereby commissioned as a Kokommando.
86-Thanks! I’ll change my name. Here. *cough cough* numbers, NaNo name *cough cough*
*sniffle* w-what about m-meee?*snif*
88- You might require some training, but I think you qualify, mostly because of your throwing skills.
Cricket? Shouldn’t we rename click and ask? aren’t the other ones literary mags. whatever.
Can I be a kokommando? Oh, and is it spelled with two m’s? ’cause everyone but PC spells it with one.
Skills: pretty good with computers, enjoys baking+art, good scientific mind, love for muse and hatred of wasted neurons.
i wanna be mostly harmless
i know………………….. i will harness the power of the animals of goombala……never heard of it here is the story
in the core of australia there has been a discovery(by me)of ninja pigs. they are very deadly because they have a weapon called “gopher chucks”eventually after hitting you enough the gophers will scratch and bite you,i know from experience.do not go anywhere near this place(goombala)DO NOT FLY OVER GOOMBALA. pigs do fly in goombala. they will attack you their. do not sail aroud goombala.they have a trained army of goldfish muhahahahaha they will blind you w/ their shinyness.then a mongoose will jump on your head causing you to splash signaling a pie attack. speaking of pies i got hit w/ a pie because im new that is how i will take over the world MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA wait why am i tellig everyone this …… oopsie
yay!
Julieb, you can probably be a Kokommando. Since I invented the term- yes, it is spelled with 2 “M’s”. We now have:
Kokommando 001- Queenie
Kokommando 002- Otzi
Kokommando 003- Julieb
When we get to Number 7, we will just call him or her 006b, for fear of enraging Bond fans after the conclusion of Mostly Harmless.
i wanna be a kokommando thingamajigger
oooooooooo can i be a spy im stealthy
Welcome to the squad, lady of the broom cupboard, aka Kokommando 004!
yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay
can i be incharge of the army of ninja pigs if we bring them into the plan
CAN I BE A KOKOMMANDO WHATCHAMACALLIT?????? I KICK HARD! AND I CAN THROW PRETTY WELL TOO, AND I CAN OVERHAND SERVE, UNDER HAND SERVE, AND SPIKE A VOLLEYBALL (or pie)! AND I USED TO PLAY SOFTBALL AND COME EQUIPPED WITH MY OWN HEAVY DUTY SOFTBALL BAT!
batteries not included.
Cheese Monkey, you are Kokommando 005!
Kokommando 001- Queenie
Kokommando 002- Otzi
Kokommando 003- Julieb
Kokommando 004- lady of the broom cupboard
Kokommando 005- Cheese Monkey NUMBA 1
96 NO NINJA PIGS
96 NO NINJA PIGS EVER EVER AGAIN
BassJelly, why are you biased against Ninja Pigs?
bass jelly is bieng mean and insensitive but i really dont want to send them because there a little unstable………i would worry they would break down under the pressure. oh well i will use there army of gophers and goldfish sooooooo since you didnt have any problems w/ them.
Ooh! I wanna be a kokommando! I can skare people really easily *gets high on sugar and dances around the room* w00t w00t! I can type pretty fast too, although i haven’t tested how fast since middle skool and i can’t remember it anyway. Plus i know how to snap a belt threateningly and blast peoples ears out with my trumpet and i’m really good at hitting people with rolled-up newspapers. You should see the rolled-up newspaper duels that go on in journalism the day the torch comes out, i totally pwn.
I think i’m getting a cold sore on my lip. Or mebbe it’s just from me mutilating them cuz they’re chapped. Or both. I pick at them too much.
That was utterly random.
Oh yeah, i can skare people away with my randomness!
Plus i have mad skillz at snowball fights.
How’s that? Can i be kokommando 42, or do we have to fill up the other 37 first? Please? *puppy dog eyes*
Kokommando 006= Ebeth
I would like to be a Kokommando too!!!
I can throw a baseball all the way across my backyard, I can bake pies (especially the chocolate cream kind my mom makes) and I could help lady of the broom cupboard spy, if she doesn’t mind. If she does, I could spy somewhere else. Oh yes- I can also draw fairly well and jump eight feet. (that’s eight feet on the ground, not up by the way)
So, what do you say? Can I be a Kokommando?? Please??
Yup. Violindino, you are Kokommando 007.
werent you going to make what 007 was 006b or somthing
108- Yeah, but nobody will really get upset. I was overestimating the vengefulness of Bond fans.
sorry about the ninja pigs lotbc
sorry about the ninja pigs lotbc supper sorry
Why any animals anyway we could be stopped and arrested for animal abuse
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
i didnt think of that
but you know these pigs cant be harmed
they are not able to get cuts or anything
ooooo burn
drop the “bash lotbc’s dumb pig attack” ok im getting depressed
I am a double agent!!!!!!! you do not know which side I am on, buT I will give you a hint “i am not orlando bloom’s puppy” BBBWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA.
* IS HAPPY WITH MYSTERIOUSNESS*
who was that weird person who just posted???? they were using my name. but that wasn’t me. Who me? no i do NOT have problems with my head. I swear! kind o,f sort of, maybe,
*is innocent*
115- don`t all musers?
Can I be Kokommando#9 please. Just ignore this until #8 comes, then make me #9. Or there could be no #8 to confuse the enemy. I can… … … um… … … I can balance my trombone without touching it for one second before it starts to fall, I can hit annoying people with my musical binder from last year like I did then, I can act, sing, read bass clef, play said trombone, get a top 10 average in the grade, use big words, speak limited and mediocre Italian, tell you random and weird facts, explain all the reasons why the sky is blue in great detail, talk forever about random stuff, stay awake past midnight, procrastinate in at least 10 ways, skip down the school hallways without remorse, be confused, confuse others, and quote Monty Python or Douglas Adams at the drop of a metaphorical hat. Any of that useful?
Can I be a Kokommando??? REALLy good with computers, small amount of tae kuan do experience.
109- *becomes vengeful Bond fan; pies*
* in a hurt, sarcastic tone* Fine. Ignore me then. I don’t care. I have better things to do with my life.
118- sounds good. 117- Hmm. Dunno. You could serve as a decoy for the White House security while the Kokommandos break in. Quote Douglas Adams and Monty Python at top speed in really bad Italian to confuse them.
take over the world by selling perfect coffee at 25 cents for a lake of it bwhahahahahahahahahaha
i want to say we stuff detergent tasting cheese into every elvis impersonaters mouth
WE WILL RULE THE WORLD
WUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAHHHHHHAAAAAAAAHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA*HACK*cough*wheeze*
ouch my throat
lady of the broom cupboard, I adore your maniacal laugh.
I thought the plan was FIRST Koko, then pies, then geometric constructions (eek,) then self-esteem coaches, THEN Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse.
Adding a couple of Campbell’s commercials along the way.
And Wal-Mart greeters, and tapeworms, and MonSanto demons, and bloggers, and. . .and . . .
And ME!!!!! Duh! ;p ;p ;p
And Buthkids, and gifted teachers, and honky-tonk idiots, and more bunnies, and Koko again, and those lovely Horsemen again. . .
The list goes on and on.
We could put ANYTHING diabolical and dangerous and horrid in here.
No offense, Koko. I SO did not mean that you are horrid/diabolical/dangerous.
Ooh! Ooh! and Postal workers! I almost forgot postal workers!
Okay, finally done.
See ya.
ooh.. 005. speshul.
we could force some dummies in an authoritacil position to wear the walmart vesty thingy…..
*jumps off walls while doing a crazy dance/jig/squardance thingamabob*
we could create a bunch of evil, generic wal-mart cashier CLONES
to take over the earth!!!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
huh
this is great . we shall rule the world
BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*cohgh*use.kids.bop.that.evil.thing.
Decoy! I bet I could be a good decoy. I could confuse the guards with my abridged encyclopedaeic knowledge of trivia. Then I hit them with my binder and skip away. The eighth grade’s going to Washington this year. A six-hour drive. Fun. And the special coach buses always break down. More fun. I’ll convert my friends to Muse and have them help. We could argue about stuff like whether or not the meaning of life is 42 or if it’s corrupted and what it means and drag the guards into it. I could enjoy this.
For the sidebar- click here!
Nobody reads the threads once they get off the main page. I’m the only one here. Someone else come here! I’m posting links on the frequently visited threads.
I’m here too!!!
YAAYYY!!!
*joins curious and questioning*
I was just lurking.
I didn’t post here in a long time because I haven’t thought of any evil, diabolitical plots.
(did I spell diabolitical right???)
Diabolical, not diabolitical. Yes, I saw your link on the election results page.
Lemme just try something…Mwahahahahaha!!!!
Step 1:Get Musebloggers to visit the Mostly Harmless thread.
Step 2:Recruit more Musebloggers and get them to visit this thread.
Step 3:Take over the workd, infiltrate the White House, torture Prince Charming, et al.
We must get this thread back on the main page!!!
MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
*Cough*
argh
so much happens when you’re gone for a little bit
we could confuse many a person with the awful phrase
“HE WHO LAUGHS LAST, LAST LAUGHS.” seriously, try saying it 10 times fast.
if you need a country to control, you could have my bedroom, which has seceded from the U.S. its 1 citizen and 100+ stuffed animals would be glad to help. Its name is Museland. You could put my stuffed animals in a pile, and bury people with them. They are very effective burying material.
Ooh, can I be a Kokommando? I can…um… lesse.
-Play high c on the flute. That’s around 6 lines up above the staff. Anyone near me covers their ear’s when I do at at forte. Mwahahaha. Beware my awsome skills.
-Am relatively good at computers. I can do stuff on them, even if I’m not the best typer.
-I can ice skate really well
-I don’t have any other reasons right now
-maybe I’ll post more later
-I have to go now
-Bye
139- He who laughs last, thinks slowest. Nice links everywhere, by the way. I couldn’t help but click, though I think some people might start finding them annoying.
may I be a kokommando?
E~A and Jadestone, I have no problems with that but I wasn’t the one making the list.
We are citizens of Museica, and since about half of Urainicia is empty, I offer it for a headquarters of sorts.
Let me make a list:
Queenie
Otzi
Julieb
lady of the broom cupboard
Cheese Monkey NUMBA 1
Ebeth
Violindino
curious and questioning(decoy)
nerdz__r00l(that’s me!!!)
(If I missed anybody, add it on to the list.)
Someone told me to click here, so I did and I don’t know why. Please help me!
(To tune of Some Where Over the Rainbow)
Somewhere over the Muse mag!
While I read!
I got so interested that I couldn’t breath!
I fainted and my mom did CPR!
It didn’t work then but I later woke up in the funeral car!
Now I’m in the crazy house for specials!
Because I started talking about random facts!
I then strangled my counselor because they tried to cancel my order!
Some where over the Muse mag!
I concured in the end!
No more reading things like Highlights mag!
The part that started with “the crazy house for specials” was the part in “Somewhere Over the Rainbpw” that has a different tune then the verses.
Ooooo… we could poke all the people to death.
OH YES 150TH POST BOO YAH
PARTY!
*blows up balloons, sets out party favors and superfluous amounts of food*
8)
Darn!!! I forgot e_a and jadestone. sorry!!!
*updates list*
List of Kokommandos:
Queenie
Otzi
Julieb
lady of the broom cupboard
Cheese Monkey NUMBA 1
Ebeth
Violindino
curious and questioning(decoy)
nerdz__r00l(that’s me!!!)
elassë~adael (alise~adae)
Jadestone
(If I missed anybody, add it on to the list.)
Me: *ah-hem* *sings* lalalalala…la…LAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*White House windows shatter, alarm is disabled*
Go get ’em, kokommandos!
We must raise money so that we can hire Woo Suk Hwang to clone Bush. Any ideas?
Okay, here’s my plan:
1.Use kokommandos to break into white house, capture bush
2. while the world is in panic, torture everybody’s minds with cambell soup commercials.
3. Use parasites/four horsemen of apocolypse/evil, generic-wal-mart-cashier-clones to take over the world
4. If anybody resists, sentence them to wathch C-SPAN reruns for 19 and a half years
The plan is in comment 57.
ah, oh well. Just include the C-SPAN part.
hello??? Is everyone here???
echo…echo…echo…
I’m here now.
Kiwimuncher-You probably clicked one of the 5-10 inks i put on common pages to attract attention to us. Read the thread, make suggestions, join us.
Plan, post 57+C-SPAN+Kokommandos (note- This plan involves Bill Gates. Some plans involve George W. Bush. You may want to change this plan to using W.)
Suppose we get some of Bill Gates’ DNA (using Kokommandos), then clone him and indoctrinate the clone with pro-Muse material from the time he is a baby. We will have to develop something that speeds up the aging process so that B2 (the clone) will not remain continually younger than the original. As soon as B2 has gotten to the age of the original, we will stop whatever it is that speeds up the aging process. Then we will send a Kokommando team to infiltrate Bill Gates’ home and replace him with B2. B2 will then secretly finance the construction of an enormous apple pie a la mode in deep space. This process will take at least fifty years. The ice cream is the key to this plan, because it will be in such quantity that, if rocketed on a collision course with Earth, it will lower the temperature of the earth significantly and plunge it into a short Ice Age. We threaten to do this, and of course the leaders of the world give up and give us control. If they hesitate, threaten them with C-SPAN. What we do after that is up to us.
158- what flavor will the ice cream be?
159- Vanilla. It will not be Bill Gates, but it will be Bush.
Alright. The first Kokonvention is taking place tomorrow in Chicago. We will establish basic duties for Kokosquad #1, such as Kokommando and Computer Genius.
Don’t plan anything at the Kokonvention unless it’s at an internet cafe or something where we who don’t live in Chicago can join in. Not that I’ll have a chance anyway to be online tomorrow anyway. *mutters something about homework* At least post the results of what you do. Please?
peoples, peoples….I think we need to start with this:
-Plan a BIIIIGGGGG kokonvention (probably in Chicago. Or Arizona)
-ANNOUNCE IT IN MUSE!!!!!!! this is absolutely critical. This way, we will be able to recruit the techless musers
-Somehow apeal to some airline’s better nature and get them to ferry all non-chicagoians (or arizonians) to whichever place the kokonvention is at. (this part needs some patching)
-Have everyone bring pies and Muse costumes and laptops and whatnot. Get to the kokonvention. Have everyone use thier blogging name instead of thier real name on thier nametag.
-In between pieing people and discussing LOTR, manga, parkour, etc., we shall formulate a plan.
Yessssssssss. That would be amazingly fun. Maybe we should threatean the airline with pies until they fly us to the kokonvention for free.
maybe we could ask Chuck Norris to threaten the airlines!!!
*evil laffter*
first, we’ll have to know where everybody came from to plan the kokovention where everyone won’t have to fly so far.
(I live in San Diego, California).
hmmm…
Everybody is in the kokovention thread now.
I’m here. New York, a city too minor to safely post. We could have conventions in any major city where 3 or more of us are willing to sit at a cafe for a few hours with a laptop, and use webcams. I might be able to persuade my parents to take me to NYC. Probably not, though. We could all set up webcams at home! That might actually work!
168-I’ll ask my mom if I can buiy a wabcam or something.
168- NYC might work for me… but maybe we could have people meed tt their local major city (like for me Philly) that way we could all do this and we could use webcams and talk from the major cities. Make sense?
Yeah I’ve been looking here for a while. You guys need someone to reasearch and find out info and blueprints *batts eyelashes* so don’t mind me!
Oops I didn’t that Curios and Questioning posted the same thing but before me…Sorry. So I figured ae clones safe enough to use? If we could containand control them it would work maybe.
We need an ORGANIZED battle plan.
Here’s my idea :We need to get to all the main leaders of the world powers. We then need to secretly kill them off and arrange it in such a way that all the predessors are for our cause. Sound good?
By the way. Why do we want to take over the world?
172-why wouldn’t we not want to?
I don’t even have a webcam.
We need to recruit more Musers who are evil geniuses, retrieve the Master from wherever he is, and get a GAPA elected president. We need a thread that people actually visit!
Echo…echo…echo…echo…
It’s a DEAD THREAD!!!
Fine , then. Don’t respond to me. See if I care. I’ll do better without you here anyway!
…
*cry* Please come back! I need you. I didn’t mean it!
175-I’m HERE!!!
At least I’m not the only one.
177-so, do you have any evil plans???
curious and questioning: I’m here! must go eat dinner. what a pontless post.
No, but not for a lack of trying. What about you?
I can’t spell. I don’t have evil plans to take over the world. I have evil plans to take over, say, the French teacher’s brain, but not the world.
I should be practicing. I technically have to do 3 hours today to make up for lack of practice yesterday and monday. Wait, no, I calculated that wrong. *Runs through house frantically looking for calculator*. No, I didn’t calculate that wrong. This week is
a 7 day practice week instead of a 6 day practice week because I don’t have anything saturday. I really should go work on my etude. And then my extremely fast piece, and then my concerto.
I have turned into an evil zombie.
*brains*
Okay everyone, the plan for Musers to take over the world is this:
Musers rule the world! Hooray!
1. First, we wait for global warming to start really affecting people.
2. We then find an ingenious plan to stop it. (I don’t know what the plan is, but somebody will have to figure it out eventually.)
3. For us to put the plan in action, we make all leaders and government officials promise to let Musers take their places.
4. We put the plan into action, take over all of the governmental places, and TADA!
Musers rule the world AND there’s no more global warming.
183-
We kidnap bush, make a brilliant rubber costume of him, put it on one of the musers and forge his signature on the Kyoto Protocol.
Not sure how much that will help, or how we’ll kidnap Bush without being sniped out.
But that’s a ok. We have plenty of time to think about it.
Meanwhile:
Reduce
reuse
recycle
rethink.
Plan to stop global warming:
-use fancy shmancy BioLab to create BIG (think sequoia size) Treeferns, such as the ones that likely overran the world and cause the last ice age because they were so effecient at absorbing greenhouse gases that they threw the world into “global cooling” mode (ironically, they then all died and became the fossil fuels that now cause Global Warming…)
-Use Guerrila Gardening (and some really big shovels) and plant them everywhere
-Sit back, relax, and enjoysaving the world!
-follow the rest of Kiara’s plan.
We suck all the carbon dioxide and/or whatever else is bad in the atmosphere out of it. Or neutralize it in such a way that it stops most, but leaves enough that Earth is a comfortable temperature. And/or we recruit all the foremost biologists to the Kokonspiracy.
Can anyone design a costume for the kokomandos???
I can!!
Hmmm… But how will I show it to everyone else if I cannot put pictures in my posts?
if we were to suck all the bad stuff out of the atmosphere, what would we do with it?
191- Maybe dump it into space? If there’s infinite s pace out there, all the bad stuff is nothing in comparison.
190-email it to the GAPAs!
Ok, I’m going to sound really stupid for not knowing this, but what’s their email address?
We’re at gapa-at-musefanpage.com.
Yeah, massive tree ferns. With ultra-resilient spores that can grow almost anywhere and reproduce very quickly.
But cities produce lots of pollution and have next to no space for the ferns to grow in.
We could knock down a few streetlights and replace them with ferns
But badly-lit streets would foster crime, and we don’t want to have to fix that when we begin our reign if it can be avoided. Could we take every other street of the cities tht are in blocks and cover it with plants? There are a lot of streets right next to each other in NYC. Are they really all necessary?
Well… they’re necessary to the people who live on them. Maybe we could genetically engineer ferns with that glowing jellyfish gene, so that they’d glow at night, and replace the streetlamps with those.
(Note: I have designed the Kokommando costume, but unfortunately my email is broken at the moment. Once it is fixed I will send it)
I’ll be a Kokommando for Halloween! How ’bout that?
HTTOTWITESANHO (acronym secret)
1. Make an issue of Muse explaining Mostly Harmless and bringing other Musers over to our cause
2. Hire an unscrupulous genetic researcher
3. Have him put together an animal that has mostly rabbit genes, but is ferocious as a wolf and has the fur pigment of a rainforest orchid, plus pheromones that make humans giddy and unfocused on tasks
4. Clone this animal 100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 times
5. Wait for them to grow to full size
6. March on Washington DC with animals in front line
7. Seize control of Senate, Supreme Court and Presidency
8. Pull US army out of all places where we’re fighting
9. Use surplus money to construct massive, nutritious, delicious, rocket-powered pies in space
10. Deliver an ultimatum to world; surrender, or pie
11. Fire massive pies at resisting countries’ governmental centers, thus rendering them leaderless and without famine at the same time
12. Use loyal followers gathered in Step 11 by ending hunger to crush any remaining resistance
Nice.